102-14. Our Blogging Queen

The time has come, once again, to reveal what's in the virtual gift box!

It meant a lot to me that so many of you chose to blog with me this semester for extra credit. That takes real motivation and commitment in such a busy semester as this one has been.

I have no hesitation in crowning Ayşe as our Blogging Queen. Her blog meets royal standards and is everything a blog should be. I was delighted by each and every post, in which I saw evidence of creativity, analysis and attention to detail, self-exploration and a kind and generous spirit. I particularly loved her "hot vocabulary" list and "quote of the month" section as well as the picture of Benjamin and Elaine from The graduate. Right at the end of this semester she changed her template to mark the 'beginning' rather than the 'end' of blogging. Actually I just find this blog breathtaking and cannot find proper words to praise it - I would encourage you all to read it. Ayşe has been blogging with me since September, so this is a special award to me. I have seen her grow and develop immensely through her blog and this has made me feel closer to her. I know we will be blogging together for a long time to come. Thank you, Blogging Queen. ♥

I would of course not neglect to mention the other wonderful blogs - first Tümay, a newcomer to blogging, who posted 28 times, tying Ayşe in quantity! Tümay was a very enthusiastic blogger and I could look forward to at least one post after our morning class every Monday. So Ayşe and Tümay, you are the joint winners of the blog race! (So nice to duplicate that tied-for-first trend, which we saw last semester with Beri and Hasan).

I will now continue down the rankings, with comments on each blog:

Ezgi O. - 27 posts - Ezgi's blog took off in a major way this semester and pretty much blew everyone out of the water for some weeks.

Simge - 20 posts - Our returning 'Little Blogger', I especially love how she 'talked' to the characters in our stories on her blog. :)

Melek - 16 posts - We're happy to have this newcomer who made many sensitive interpretations of our course readings.

Hasan - 16 posts - Hasan's unique voice is back with us this semester, and I am proud of the changes I've witnessed in his thinking. ;)

Hazal - 15 posts - Hazal is such a wonderfully talented writer and an astute commentator on the human scene.

Nazlı - 15 posts - Another new blogger who showed incredible effort - don't miss her post on 'The rainbow coding in The bluest eye'.

Can - 14 posts - Can is a perfectionist, and it shows. His writing has gone from strength to strength.

Cemre Naz - 13 posts - Another returning blogger who incorporated so much of our class discussions and material into her blog.

Gamze - 11 posts - Gamze made a huge amount of effort on her blog and it is a delight to read - don't miss her wonderful African song/video, I guarantee it will make your soul sing.

Reşide - 11 posts - A new blogger who worked hard to create a permanent reminder of our wonderful novel.

Congratulations to all of you listed above, as you have met (and even exceeded) the criteria for extra credit, and your final grade will thereby be increased by one increment, for example from B+ to A-. As you know, I was looking for steady blogging over the semester as well as comments made on your blog and mine and on other students' blogs. Although I had 12 posts in mind as the cutoff, I must say that the effort and care that Gamze and Reşide put into their blogs convinced me that they had earned this honour as well - quality won out over quantity here!

A warm thank you goes to all of you who did some blogging, even if you could not meet the extra credit threshold:

Didem, Tuğçe K., Atalay, Ezgi Y., Elif, Bahar, Onur O., Zeynep, Mehmet Ali, Billur, Tuğçe Y., Ece, Merve, Deniz K., Sıla, Can Ç.

Finally, I cannot encourage you enough to *keep on/start/resume* writing on your blogs - that goes for all of you reading this, not just the people mentioned here. And I promise this:

I will be your ever-dedicated reader and commentator.

Thank you to ALL students who blogged with me in this academic year. Your blogs will be the outstanding models for my future students. I'm really very proud of you.

THIS IS NOT THE END OF MY BLOG, SO STAY TUNED... ;)

Sonja - out. ♥

'The Crown Jewels at the Tower of London' by Edgley Cesar, licenced under Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-Share Alike 2.0

102-13. Shuffle @ Mayfest and its star, HASAN CAN SARAL

It is always an honour for a teacher to receive an invitation to marvel at the talents of one of her students - and the rock/pop band Shuffle was well and truly worth travelling to campus on a Sunday for. They were awesome - and I'm not just saying that. But the one who shone above the rest was my dear student Hasan.

Just look at how cool he is:
<----


I am so impressed by this guy's many talents - he seems to have a bottomless well of them! And to top it all off, he has a killer smile and he's not afraid to use it!

Here's a photo of myself and some ex-ENG students enjoying the performance:

Thank, you Hasan!

To all of you: next time Shuffle plays, kaçırmayın!

102-12. Precious and Pecola

As you know, because of the Bayram this week I showed the film Precious by Lee Daniels to Sections A2 and D2.

I chose this film because it dramatises many of the same themes we saw in The bluest eye. It's set in Harlem in 1987. Precious (Claireece Precious Jones), the African-American protagonist, is 16 years old, semi-literate, overweight and unattractive. Physically abused by her mother, sexually abused by her father since the age of 3, Precious is pregnant with her father's second child; the first child, nicknamed 'Mongo', has Down's Syndrome and is being cared for by her grandmother. Precious is suspended from school for being pregnant (I don't know how this is legal, actually), but her principal recommends an alternative school, and it is here that she meets dedicated teacher Miss Rain and a small group of female classmates ranging from former drug addicts to gang members, all of whom are struggling to improve their reading skills in order to get their GEDs (a qualification equivalent to a high school diploma). After giving birth to her second child, Abdul Jamal, Precious learns that her rapist father has died - and that he has given her the HIV virus.

Here are some of the heartbreaking parallels between the lives of Precious and Pecola:

• Both are unwanted by their mothers and raped by their fathers.
  
• Both are very black and 'ugly' and suffer from an extreme lack of self-worth: "We're just ugly black grease to be wiped away" - this line really affected me.
  
• Neither girl opens her mouth at school, and both are teased and bullied.
  
• To escape her abuse and her torment, Precious envisions herself as a diva on a floodlit stage wearing beautiful costumes and watched by an adoring young man; Pecola tells Frieda and Claudia of the pretty dresses and jewellery given to her by the three whores and eventually goes mad, believing herself to be a bird that can fly away from the pain.
  
• Precious slowly does her hair in front of the mirror as a slim blonde white woman gazes serenely back at her; Pecola loves little white girls like Shirley Temple and ends up believing she has blue eyes, the bluest eyes.
  
• Precious writes in her journal that she wants to be "skinny, light-skinned and have long wavy hair"; Pecola is jealous of Maureen Peal's light skin, green eyes and soft hair.

I watched this film with an enormous sense of shame. I know I am not personally responsible, but I feel a collective sense of guilt that African-Americans are still living in such appalling conditions in our country. Maybe you know the old saying, 'The more things change, the more they stay the same'.

However, unlike Pecola, Precious gets a chance at redemption. She develops friendships with her teacher, classmates and the male nurse who helped deliver her baby; she wins a mayor's award for literacy; she greatly improves her score on the literacy test; she rejects her mother once and for all after her mother confesses to having allowed her husband to repeatedly touch and rape her daughter; she starts attending therapy groups for survivors of sexual abuse; she gets her firstborn child back and vows to teach her children, to meet their needs. She is a tower of strength, and Daniels shows us her humanity, as Morrison showed us Pecola's humanity. By the end of the film we no longer see an obese black girl, we see a person.

Please read more good posts about this film:

• Tümay
• Simge
• Ezgi O.
• Cemre Naz
• Ezgi Y.
  

'Peacock feather' by Panache, licenced under Creative Commons Attribution Noncommercial 2.0 Generic

102-11. The bluest sky

I am haunted by one passage in particular from The bluest eye:

"The orange-patched sky of the steel-mill section never reached this part of town. This sky was always blue" (p. 105).

In many ways, this one sentence exemplifies not only the racist and classist segregation of Lorain, Ohio, but everything that is wrong with our world. We gluttonously consume without thinking of the consequences, the human cost, the ecological cost. As long as the skies of our lives are blue, we give little thought to the suffering of others, and we are determined to maintain that blueness even if we have to paint it on, thereby creating an artifice and ignoring the encroaching orange patches all around us. I believe humans should strive for happiness, but we have an enormous blind spot, and our capacity for happiness will, in a most profound irony, cause our ultimate destruction - unless we can find happiness in alleviating the misery of others and working to solve the enormous problems we are faced with. We need to derive our contentment from an understanding of the whole, not lie under our blue sky oblivious to the choking pollution just over the way.

'Untitled' by Guilherme Cecílio, licenced under Creative Commons Attribution NonCommercial ShareAlike 2.0

102-10. False loyalties: Pauline and the white woman

For my first post on our novel The bluest eye, I'd like to write about false loyalties. Recall that before she joined the Fisher family as a maid, Pauline Breedlove worked for another white woman (pp. 118-121). Although the family is quite dirty, in a literal sense, and she doesn't especially like the white woman, she is at least getting by - until Cholly turns up drunk demanding money. This precipitates a confrontation between Pauline and the white woman:

"She said she would let me stay if I left him. I thought about that. But later on it didn't seem none too bright for a black woman to leave a black man for a white woman" (p. 120).

Here we see Pauline's unwillingness to betray her own race - not because she loves Cholly or being black, but because she senses that black people have to stick together, and that white people cannot be trusted to help them out of their predicament. Although uneducated, Pauline has wise instincts. And unfortunately, she is right to be mistrustful; because she cannot bring herself to leave Cholly, the white woman withholds the $11 she owes her, money that will put food in the mouths of her children. This cruel conditionality serves to highlight the power inequalities between this middle-class white woman and the hapless Pauline, ones which the white woman seems entirely oblivious to:

"...she told me I shouldn't let a man take advantage over me. That I should have more respect, and it was my husband's duty to pay the bills, and if he couldn't, I should leave and get alimony" (p. 120).

This encounter predicts some of the difficulties of the third wave of feminism, which was once again largely led by white middle-class women. However, what differentiated this period of feminism was the growing chorus of voices from women of colour, oppressed by both race and gender, who argued that the mainstream women's movement at best failed to address and at worst marginalised their specific concerns. The white woman here naively assumes that all women are on equal footing - which is ironic since she employs the black woman - and sees Pauline's abusive marriage as something that can be ended with a simple personal choice. The gulf between the two women is endless.

And notice that the white woman never pays the money that is very nearly a matter of life and death for Pauline. For all her 'concern' about Pauline's self-respect, she ends up consigning her to a further round of suffering and misery. I was reminded of the land owner in "The man who was almost a man", which we read last semester. Many students were convinced that he 'loved' the black boy Dave; here we see the fickleness of such love. Black servants are 'loved' as long as they toe the line, do not talk back. The Fisher family 'loves' Pauline - but how long do you think their loyalty would last if it were in any way tested?

'N' by Cedric Favaro, licenced under Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 2.0 Generic

102-9. Spring break philosophising..

Oh my, I'm a bit behind in my posting, aren't I? I mean, this is Week 10, so this should be my 10th post. I forgot to post one during my conference week.. :)

Who would have thought we'd still be dreaming of spring during the spring break? Renewal is coming a bit late this year..

Just five more weeks to go, çocuklar. I can't believe it. This semester has instantly gone from interminable to slipping away far too quickly, I cannot hold onto it..then I will no longer (and nevermore) be your Freshman English teacher, how weird is that, especially when I think of those of you who've been with me since September. I will have to relinquish possessiveness, that's always hard for me. Goodbyes are even harder.

There are many things to be grateful for this year, mostly the things I've come to know about you and the development I've witnessed. It's nice to see your children grow up. :)

I have to say that being around all of you has kept me young. My mother always says I was born 40. Well, I went from being '40' to being 19 again, and I relived part of my youth. That's a rare opportunity for sure. It showed me that although there were many things I could or should have done differently, I would never want to go back. Hindsight is a marvellous thing because it helps you see how you led yourself to the present point. So I encourage you to keep writing on your blogs for as long as you can, because when you look back on that writing at some future interval, you will shake your head in helpless wonder at your precious self, and you will treasure that previous incarnation and embrace it from a distance.

I will miss you..

'The remains' by Manuela Hoffman, licenced under Creative Commons Attribution Non-Commercial No Derivative Works 2.0 Generic

102-8. My conference presentation :)

Well, I did it. I presented at my first international conference. This was the 44th Annual IATEFL (International Association of Teachers of English as a Foreign Language) Conference and Exhibition in Harrogate, North Yorkshire, UK.

You know how I've asked you all to write an I-Search paper at the end of this semester? Well, last year in ENG 102 I asked my students to do that for the first time. My presentation is based on 52 responses: what worked, what I felt needed improving for this time - in other words, you're all benefitting from their feedback. :) This is why, for example, I decided to give detailed individual feedback to the annotated bibliographies this time rather than whole class feedback.

You can view my abstract and even download my Powerpoint slides and my handout here. It would be great to hear your feedback. :)

You cannot imagine how much I sweated over the preparation of this presentation. At one point it was getting out of hand, but fortunately my boss stepped in at that point and invited me to her office to talk through it. I had ridiculously overcomplicated it (my speciality). Once I was given 'permission' to just relax and not feel I had to include everything, it was much easier.

Strangely, I wasn't nervous at all on the day of the presentation, and in the end a mere 8 people turned up (out of 1900), two of whom were my colleagues! But there were questions from the audience throughout and two teachers stayed behind to chat. Best of all, my boss had loaned me her geeky laser pointer remote thingie and that was great fun to use..I got so close to my audience I was practically standing on top of them!

There were quite a few presenters there from Turkish universities: Bilkent, Marmara, Istanbul University, Fatih...but SU had the most - 8! :D

I'm not a huge fan of conferences to be honest, but when I believe in something, I go for it.
My next several presentations will all be based on your marvellous blogs...more to come on that! ;)

102-7. Blog race, anyone?

Once again our blogging endeavours are being spiced up by a friendly race! Ayşe and Ezgi O. (the lovely roommates) have kicked off this semester's competition...Bahar, Gamze and Melek quickly weighed in with their determination, and for a bit it looked as if this would be a female-dominated race, or "cat fight" as Ayşe termed it - but wait! now Onur wants a piece of the action! The prize is up for grabs!

Well, this is some formidable competition - anyone care to take these bloggers on?

'Race to infinity' by The iconoclastic yet iconic ionic icon, licenced under Creative Commons Attribution Noncommercial ShareAlike 2.0.

102-6. Virtual blogging awards, round 2! ;)

Those of you who blogged with me last semester will remember this box. :))

This time I'm announcing this 'contest' well in advance; once again, at the end of the semester, I will be posting some virtual blogging awards here. These will include top blogger as well as those deserving honourable mention. The following attributes will be taken into consideration:
-quantity
-quality (reflection, analysis, creativity, writing skills)
-interaction with other blogs (including mine) and responding to comments made on yours

Last time competition was stiff as Beri (blue ribbon/silver cup winner) and Hasan (red ribbon winner) jockeyed for position in their mind-blowing 'blog race' - but I had to invent a runner-up category for Hasan in the end, so sorry man, wahwahwahhh :D ...and where's your blog race this semester, guys? I'm so pleased to note that most of those in the honourable mention category are back blogging again: Simge, Hazal, Onur, Ayşe, Elif and Can. Your blogs just get better and better. And Bahar, your blog has come on a bomb! Keep it up! Ezgi O., you're certainly on an impressive spree!

Check out all our lovely new bloggers on my ENG 102 blogroll - Tümay and Nazlı merit a mention even at this early stage.

Remember that blogging is an extra credit option this time - and it's not too late to get started! ;)

I really want to give this extra credit...I'm just waiting for your posts!

What's in the box this time? :-p

'Gift' by mrjoro, made available under Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-Share Alike 2.0 Generic

102-5. Assumptions hurt!

We've been talking about this of course, in an academic sense, but the other day at lunch I was reminded of how painful and infuriating it is to be on the receiving end of someone else's ignorance. I cannot disclose the details of the conversation - not that I have any interest in protecting this person's identity, but just out of my own sense of professionalism - but 'someone' made some very arrogant assumptions about one of my family members in order to prove a 'point' about a very controversial issue in Turkey. These assumptions were seemingly based solely on the manufactured fluff that passes for this person's brain. I remained calm, but I did not acquiesce: "Sorry, but how do you know that about my family member?"; "No, in actual fact that's not the case"; "I think you should ask for facts before you make assumptions" etc., but this person's motormouth was in overdrive and no listening was taking place, just a vitriolic spewing of prejudice the likes of which I have not heard in some time. 'Education' makes no difference to this particular issue amongst a certain segment of the Turkish populace: it is a blindly emotional, irrational and deep-grained brainwashed response. When you know and love a person who does not possess any of the negative characteristics of a so-called stereotype, you realise just how destructive and unfair such stereotypes really are. I was so angry afterwards that I was unable to concentrate well for the rest of the day; I just kept thinking of the self-righteous look that such people get on their faces as they bulldoze all rationality. And in fact, it makes sense that they just keep on shouting instead of listening, since intolerance cannot long survive when it's confronted with cold facts.

I've got an announcement to make: protesting perceived fascism with your own brand of fascism is not the solution. As MLK put it, "An eye for an eye leaves everyone blind."

'Martin Luther King smile' by Nelson Piedra, licenced under Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 2.0 Generic

102-4. Our first month together

Dear students,

Four weeks of ENG 102 have passed already - time really flies!

I thought I would share some of my observations of our first month together. Of course I am so pleased that 54% of my students are back from previous semesters, but I'm also happy to have met all you newcomers. It seems by now we should all have settled in a bit.

WHAT HAS BEEN GOOD SO FAR

Blogging
I am delighted to report that as of this week, more than half of you have decided to keep a blog this semester. When I started this individual blogging project at the beginning of last semester, I never could have imagined it would come this far. With those of you who are blogging for the second consecutive semester, I really see changes in your approach - your writing is more mature, more thoughtful, and best of all, more personal. You seem to be developing a sense of yourself as writers in English and getting in touch with your audience. That is so wonderful to see. I can really feel that your motivation is not coming from the thought of extra credit, but rather from inside. That's a crucial shift.

Research papers
It seems to me that most of you have been able to find a topic that interests you on a personal level, and I consider that a real achievement from a teaching perspective. Some of you have even expressed genuine excitement to me about our course theme, as well as the conviction that our explorations of identity this semester will help you to make sense of your own identities.

Class discussions
On the whole, these have been impressive. I have heard some sophisticated analyses of our stories, texts and film. I would encourage you to keep striving to find a greater level of precision in your use of language - I'm sure that sometimes it is not the thought or understanding that is lacking, but simply the right words in English to put it into. I appreciate the courage it takes to try to express complex ideas in a foreign language, particularly in front of a group of your peers.

WHAT NEEDS IMPROVEMENT

Class preparation
This has been variable. Some of you prepare regularly and thoroughly, but it doesn't seem like the majority, I'm afraid. I am concerned that when readings are assigned, the main strategy seems to be 'skimming'. The short stories and articles need to be read carefully. You most likely need to take notes, at least in the margins. And you need to check unfamiliar vocabulary in the dictionary. Having a vague sense of a text's meaning can actually be more confusing than helpful. I try not to overload you with reading, as I know you have lots to do for other classes. I try to make it fair and manageable. I do check SU Course statistics to see who is keeping up, which I must confess sometimes puts me in a very gloomy mood before our lessons if it is apparent that only a few people will be prepared. Thanks to Nazlı for reminding me that some students have purchased the Canon photocopy pack, so SU Course reports can be misleading. ;)

Timekeeping and classroom conduct
I was very, very tolerant of late arrivals in the first three weeks of the semester. This was to allow you to readjust to attending classes after the semester break and also taking into consideration the confusion of the add/drop period. But my previous students will surely attest to my insistence on punctuality. I want to start and finish the classes on time. I have seen students arriving to class 20 minutes late, and sometimes even more. This is surely not acceptable in anyone's eyes. We have very little time to spend together, and we need to be as focussed as possible. I want to tell you that I take punctuality into account when determining the final Class Participation grade.

The next point is about mobile phones. For the first time this semester, I have seen students openly texting in class, not seeming to care if I see them or not. Even after I ask politely for the mobiles to be put away, I see this sort of thing carrying on. My view on mobiles is simple: they have no place in our lessons. You are welcome to use them during the break. And if you are expecting a crucial call, simply inform me, and leave the classroom when the call comes in. Otherwise, your social lives and our lessons really do not complement one another. Thanks to Mehmet for pointing out that some students take notes on their phones; if this is the case, can you please just inform me so that I don't harass you. ;)

Finally, I want to mention social interaction. Many times I ask how people are, or I ask for your feedback or opinions on something, and I get absolutely no reply - everyone looks at the floor, and a terrible silence descends. I cannot tell you how awful this makes me feel. I'm a teacher, but I'm also a person. If I ask you a question, it's a genuine one. I do not want to perform my job mechanically; I actually value the relationships I build through teaching. I personally need to interact with my students. You know we English teachers do not follow a lecture format, and we really do want to see interaction, and that applies to student-student interaction as well. Must we always sit with our friends? Couldn't we try to get to know someone else in the class? Let's try to break this "go straight to the back row and sit as far away from the action as possible" mentality. I am really worried about this.

Thanks for your hard work and contributions so far, and let's keep this up.

Yours truly,
Sonja

102-3. Where are we going, where have we been?

As you can see from the image I have chosen for this post, I am desperate for spring, to see my favourite colour, that deep velvety green, to feel the possibilities of a new paradigm and to renew my hope in what is to come.

But this tender leaf also symbolises the tender period of adolescence. Connie, in Oates' masterful short story "Where are you going, where have you been?" is just at that awkward age of early womanhood when the body seems to have more influence over the person than the mind, when unfulfilled longings crowd the eventuality of a broader vision of self.

Let's look at that enigmatic last line of the story once more:

"My sweet little blue-eyed girl," he said, in a half-sung sigh that had nothing to do with her brown eyes but was taken up just the same by the vast sunlit reaches of the land behind him and on all sides of him, so much land that Connie had never seen before ad did not recognize except to know that she was going to it.

That land, that uncharted territory of lived experience, of sexual knowledge, of the vast question mark, of the world outside the narrow confines of Connie's sheltered suburban existence. We must all make that journey, make that terrifying leap across the chasm from the known to the unknown. Coming of age is only one such trip.

There is plenty of evidence to suggest that Arnold Friend's visit is conjured out of Connie's music-induced daydream; he comes up the drive at the very point at which she is drowsy from listening to the radio, their conversation mingles at various points with the sounds of rock and the voices of DJs. If we drop the two R's (Rock and Roll) from Arnold's name and come up with his concealed identity, An Old Fiend, if we consider the oddity of Arnold's appearance, behaviour and use of language as well as his inability to cross the threshold of Connie's house uninvited (a historical limitation of the devil), if we accept that Arnold Friend is indeed an incarnation of Satan, then what is Oates actually trying to say? And why would Connie create such a terrifying vision out of her subconscious? Connie is living on the knife edge of ambiguity; she wants to mature sexually, is thrilled by the thought of romance and desire, yet at the same time she recognises the inherent danger to her female self: the threat, the implicit violence, the ever-present possibility of rape. Note that the sexual politics in this story are very different to those in The graduate. But critics have also suggested that Oates is severely critiquing the values of modern society in this story; given that, how would you ultimately interpret the ending?

Hazal has written brilliantly about the numbers 33 19 17 on the side of Arnold's car, and Ezgi O. has linked the story to our ENG 101 documentary, Tough guise. I very much recommend reading their posts.

'Spring Dreams' by ViaMoi, licenced under Creative Commons Attribution Noncommercial NoDerivative Works 2.0.

102-2. Seduced by moral decadence: The graduate

It is still so difficult to know where to begin exploring this satire on the 'aging' values of a generation that worships the "neon god" of capitalism and materialism in a decade of changing social mores that was to bring about profound changes in the structure of American society. It's no wonder that poor pensive Ben, surrounded by the cocktail-swigging glitterati in their garish tans, their smiles painted on like that creepy puppet from Saw, feels "a little worried" about his future. Although "plastics" may seem to point the way forward to a career, plastic is in fact already the norm: a plastic, inert, phony, meaningless life awaits him. And as Ben figuratively drowns himself at the bottom of the pool, his protest against living in the fishbowl of his upper middle class Los Angeles suburb, he acquiesces to the moral decadence which Mrs. Robinson has so brazenly offered him. His parents have pushed his mask, pushed him under in their overzealous desire to make their lives vicariously meaningful through his achievements, and I really loved my students' interpretations that the four sides of the pool represent the boundaries of his life, and that he phones Mrs. Robinson at this very point because his parents cannot do anything more to him; he has been drowned (in their odious values) to the point of reaching equilibrium.

Some critics have found the relationship between Ben and Elaine somewhat unbelievable, and have noted that nothing in Ben's character satisfactorily prepares the audience for his sudden spur to action. I thought about this a lot (as I watched the film five times in one week..). Finally I concluded that it was Elaine's tears in the strip club that awoke Ben from his indifference. It is the first genuine emotion he has observed in months, perhaps years. It makes her a real person, and her humiliation highlights her sexual innocence, which further differentiates her from Mrs. Robinson and her sophisticated sexual prowess (Mrs. Robinson also shows great vulnerability, to the audience - the most interesting scene if you ask me - but she hides it from Ben). This finally snaps Ben back to himself, allows him to feel again. Is it 'love'? Surely not, but at least Ben is talking again, and his aimlessness is replaced with a burning obsession to have Elaine.

Although Elaine may seem more expressive than Ben, she is also drifting: she "might" marry Karl ("That guy from the zoo?"), she "might" marry Ben, and she states this with all the emotion of someone pondering whether to drink a normal or a Diet Coke. Does she 'love' Ben? I very much think not. In a fit of fickleness and impulsiveness, she only decides she wants Ben when he tells her to go. I think she is actually the most problematic character: as one of my students put it, she's just a pretty face, but she's even more aimless than Ben. Are we supposed to sympathise with her just because she's young? To me her personality is entirely insipid.

The church scene is priceless. Ben swings the crucifix at the crowd, throwing their hypocritical moral values back in their faces, and they shrink back, as one of my students put it, as if they were vampires being attacked by a silver cross. They are either frightened by the supposed power of god or simply repelled by good because of their inherent evil. How 'moral' is it to force one's daughter to marry someone she doesn't love, just for the sake of revenge and respectability? It may seem as if it's Ben who's making a mockery of the house of god by blasphemously waving the cross, but in fact I think it's the guests themselves - and they are locked into the house that hypocrisy built.

But ultimately, it is a pointless rebellion: Ben and Elaine have fallen back on their parents' values, and they have scored a hollow victory. They start to realise this even as the bus barrels down the road; their smiles of triumph quickly fade away, replaced by uncertainty and anxiety. What now? Where do we go from here? Where are we going, where have we been?

'Woman legs' by Nick-K., licenced under Creative Commons Attribution Noncommercial 2.0 Generic.

102-1. Some thoughts on adolescence

'Hands up' by vapour trail, licenced under Creative Commons Attribution No Derivative Works 2.0

Welcome to my first post of the new semester! I have missed blogging here, as well as receiving and responding to your comments...

Since our discussions on Monday, which I found very interesting, I have been thinking over this concept of adolescence. Several of you mentioned hormonal changes during this period which result in things like acne...well, I have been pondering my most recent acne outbreak, noting that my face these days is resembling nothing so much as a pizza...When I think of an adolescent, the adjectives that most readily come to my mind are self-centered, angst-ridden, insecure and depressed. But wait! I can certainly apply all those labels to myself even now...I suppose this has two possible implications: 1. either we never leave adolescence behind or 2. the whole concept of (Western) adolescence is indeed a myth, a stereotype. I will be curious to find out your take on this...

I had an unhappy childhood (after the age of 5 or so) and my teenage years were even worse, due particularly to my rural, narrow-minded high school, where I was consistently teased and bullied, and where anyone with a point of view that did not match that of the George Bushes of the world was made to suffer. And although I have been vindicated on many points by now, I am still bitter. That time planted the seeds of escape in my mind.

On to university...adjustment the first year was hard. We were exhausted all the time, sleeping at odd times of the day, sleeping in the library, drooling on biology books...I was working in my hometown at the weekends, staying with my abusive boyfriend, so I was caught between two worlds. I used to cry every Sunday night when I came back to campus. Well, I was seventeen, so young actually. I did not maximise my opportunities at university; instead, I stood outside looking in and thinking how phony it all was, wanting more but not knowing where to find it. There was no one to guide me. Although I was 'successful' in an academic sense, especially after my freshman year, it all felt meaningless, hollow...I used to have the frequent sensation that the bottom was dropping out of the world...I don't think I actually started 'enjoying' my time there until my senior year, and then of course it ended all too quickly and scarily. I can greatly sympathise with Benjamin in The graduate; I even remember trying to convince my father that I 'couldn't' graduate yet: I needed more French, I needed more literature...I was terrified at the prospect of the job market, wondering what I possibly had to offer anyone and instinctively despising corporate life. That's when I made my escape back to London, where I had studied for a semester during my senior year...this June I will have been living abroad continuously for 13 years.

I don't mean to be grim, but life doesn't really get any easier. You just develop better coping strategies perhaps, and you fall back more on the richness of your slowly accumulated experiences.

I am writing this now because I'm trying to write my way out of an unexpected depression that slammed down on me at the beginning of this week. I had been so looking forward to this semester, but I am already 'drowning' like Benjamin at the bottom of the pool (remember how his parents pushed his mask, pushed him under?) I know I am not alone in this. Those of you who are feeling anxious are also not alone. We will get through this semester (in style), and we will grow.

32. Virtual blogging awards

The time has come to reveal what's in the virtual gift box!

I am still simply overwhelmed by this whole blogging experience. I feel like some sort of blogging master of the universe.

Although two students reached mind-blowing heights of 32 posts each (and both won the red ribbon Diet Coke race ;-), if I also consider depth of analysis, frequency of posting and quantity of interaction (31 comments), I think we have a clear blue-ribbon winner. So congratulations, Beri. Your blog, in my humble opinion, is a masterpiece. I would encourage you all to read it, and Beri, please please please do not stop writing on it.

Hasan, you have more than earned the distinction of close runner-up with your 32 posts and 24 comments. Even if I find your reasoning frustrating sometimes ;-), I was always entertained by your humour and I really enjoyed your egging me on throughout the semester, always with a smile.

It was quite difficult to limit my choice of blogs for honourable mention since competition was stiff, and every blog is unique and valuable to me. The following blogs were chosen for the frequency and quantity of posting and comments, as well as depth and quality of content:

Elif K. - 28 posts, 43 comments
Simge - 22 posts, 22 comments
Ayşe - 20 posts, 33 comments
Hazal - 18 posts, 44 comments
Onur O. - 18 posts, 16 comments
Meltem - 16 posts, 26 comments
Can M. - 14 posts, 28 comments

You may be happy to know that I have already decided to make blogging an 'extra credit option' in ENG 102; after all this success there is no way I can simply let it go.

A huge thank you to everyone who took this journey with me.

'Success' by kevinthoule, licenced under Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 2.0 Generic

31. Your smiling faces, Christmas Eve 2009

from Section B3:
Nil, Duygu, Cem, Onur, Hasan, Arda, Emir and Beri ♥

from Section A3:
Fatih, Simge, Begüm, Mali, Serra, Hazal, Denise, Selen and Metin ♥














It's a shame I don't have a picture of C3 or D3 - that's my mistake and my loss - but I will not forget you.

Sonja ♥

30. FINAL blogging ideas for lagger bloggers...

We are entering our final week of 'official' blogging, and I have noticed that some of you have quite a way to go to reach the desired goal of 14 posts. So, once again inspired by the posts popping up on my blogroll, allow me to make some suggestions that can help you reach or at least approach the target.

• You can write about our upcoming exam, as Denise has done. And as you re-read the texts and re-watch the films, even if you've already blogged about these, you can post a 'Volume 2' in Hasan style.

• You can write a self-evaluation of your final presentation: have a look at the examples on Begüm's, Elif's and Albert's blogs.

• You can blog about the other presentations you have seen, and you can also write about the presentation films of the other groups, as Can has done.

• You could share your reflections on 2009 or your expectations of 2010; Elif leads the way.

• You could try answering one of the exam questions we brainstormed in class. Just write it as a normal blog post; there is no need to do it as a practice exam. You can even jot down your ideas in note form.
  

• You can write a final evaluation of our ENG 101 class, preferably after our last class on Thursday. A self-evaluation would make a most interesting post. ;-)
  

I hope this gives you at least a few places to start. If anyone wants more ideas, you need only let me know.

p.s. If anyone has other ideas, please add them to the Comments section of this post to help your classmates out! ;-)

Happy blogging!
Sonja

29. ENG 102 :)

Screenshot of our class wiki for ENG 102.

I thought I would give you all a 'sneak preview' of ENG 102, particularly what I have been planning, am planning, and will still be planning for the next month or so. I think it not out of order to do a little 'shameless promotion' to try to get you into my class again next semester. :) Last year 25 ENG 101 students joined my ENG 102 classes; ten of them studied in the same section, and that class in particular was special for that very reason. In fact, I received the most awesome news imaginable on New Year's Eve: my former ENG 101/102 student was chosen by the rector as 'The best ENG 102 student', and will spend a week at MIT in the spring, all expenses paid by SU! That is truly the pinnacle of pride for a teacher, and I cannot think of anyone who deserves this opportunity more. So a million congratulations to Sami, you're a star, and thanks for everything, not least for keeping me sane, you know what I mean.

So what's on the agenda for 102? Our overarching course theme is 'Explorations of Identity'. We will explore issues of race and adolescence in particular through a number of texts and short stories. We will also read Toni Morrison's wonderful 1970 novel, The Bluest Eye, and learn to use a class wiki (see screenshot) to explore the novel in preparation for our final seminar presentations. If you wonder what a wiki is and what it has to do with you, join my class! ;-) You may also be wondering how a 'seminar' presentation differs from what we have done in ENG 101. Basically, the difference lies in the greater degree of audience interaction, which you will elicit and develop throughout the presentation.

The other major project is a research paper. This is more than just a drafted essay; you will learn how to use the library databases, how to evaluate Internet sources, and how to prepare an annotated bibliography, all of which are valuable academic skills. The paper itself will be considerably longer than our ENG 101 essays, giving you more scope to delve into your research.

I think it's only fair to tell you that ENG 102 requires more work than ENG 101, so you should prepare yourself mentally. Participation also carries greater weight, so your contributions to the class will be, shall we say, scrutinised more carefully. ;-)

I am going to wait to get your final feedback on ENG 101 before finalising preparations for next semester, but this is the general outline.

I want to make next semester the best ever for personal reasons. I am thinking that if I wish hard enough, at least some of you will materialise before my eyes in the week of 15th February.